Bliss is defined as an emotional state that is characterized by feelings of enjoyment, pleasure, and satisfaction. It is an emotion, simply put. Emotions can be up one day and down the next, but learning to "choose" bliss is something that we all should try to do. I understand it takes two to make a thing go right, but many times it is a choice to choose to be happy instead of the opposite of choosing to focus on the negative.
Your wedding day should not be the best day of your marriage. In fact, it should be the beginning of many years of growing forever in love with each other. Many of us grow up thinking marriage is a fairytale and have such high expectations of what it looks like, that when we get married we soon discover it is not what we thought and our bubble bursts and we are disappointed. By first understanding that marriage is a partnership and it takes work, every day, you will be much better off getting started.
If you find yourself with a burst bubble, take a look back at why you married this person in the first place. Think about the things that attracted you to this person. Think about the great things this person does and is. Focus on the good and soon your bubble will be back, but it will be different, more realitstic.
After years of living with the disillusionment I've learned first hand that making the choice to work at my marriage daily and the choice to choose happiness is vital to a long lasting relationship! I've come up with some "guidelines" to live by in order to achieve marital bliss:
- Meet each others’ needs: (If you don't meet the others needs, they will find it elsewhere!)
Women need – security, non-sexual affection, communication & leadership
- Communicate, communicate, communicate!
- Be Honest, even if it hurts!
- R * E * S * P * E * C * T
- Don’t do or say anything to anyone you wouldn’t if your spouse were there.
- Don’t hold grudges & don’t get offended.
- Communicate your differences kindly.
- Do not raise your voices to one another.
- Continue to seek/pursue each other as you did when dating.
- Work to keep yourselves looking good.
- Speak blessings & encouragement to one another
- Pray with and for one another
- Be gentle spoken & gentle hearted with each other
- Recreate together
- Spend time alone, without the kids (date night & vacations)
- Set goals together
- Love your children & have the same ideas on raising them
- Work together in the home (house chores)
- Keep priorities straight – God first, Spouse second & children third
- Be quick to admit your mistakes & ask forgiveness
- Serve each other
- Tell each other “I Love You” a lot, each day
- Be accountable to each other
- Greet each other at the door with a hug & kiss
- Say goodbye each day with a hug & kiss
Now this is a goal worth working for!!!
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